Blog Farm

The Blog Farm

Friday, November 15, 2013

Feet on the Ground

She roared a bit too fast into the parking lot, music blaring. Perhaps not the best way to introduce herself to a new social group, she thought, turning the music off too late to have prevented the turning of heads. Today marked a beginning and an end.

Mid-November but the the thermometer read January. Layered clothing, warm hats, gloves, wind-breaker pants. She was stepping out on an expedition with a group of folks who were mostly new acquaintances. Her love of hiking could now be fully indulged, and since Michael's death she had been logging at least thirty kilometres a week with friends who would call spontaneously and pull her out. Nothing worked better than a hike to dispel the lingering wisps of sadness. At the very least she drags her sometimes reluctant dogs every morning for a brisk two to three kilometre spree but their aging, tired bodies allow little more. Weather is never an impediment for her.

The group of about thirty folks gathers weekly for an eight to ten kilometre hike on the region's vast network of trails through the Gatineau Park, her house merely minutes away from such stunning beauty. Three subgroups formed according to fitness levels. She confidently placed herself in the top group and found she had little trouble with the pace, impressed, in fact, with the overall fitness level of the sixty-plus age group. She was possibly the youngest but by no means the fittest.

She had had a plan: Three trips in two months - more travel than she has done in decades - allowed her to put life on hold for that time, to be distracted from her grief. Between journeys she concentrated mostly on estate matters but little else, except to have a policy of never turning down a social invitation. Once she got her feet on the ground after her last journey in early November, though, she had vowed to make some life decisions. Nothing huge, of course. The conventional wisdom is to do nothing rash for a year. She finds herself rattling around in her now over-large house that holds too many ghosts and sweet memories. When her children descend upon her, the house easily accommodates them, but those occasions are now rare. She will assess her needs in the spring and consider divesting herself of what now seems like a mansion. Where she might go is an unanswered question. This house needs life and love to fill it, not the empty silence that now prevails.

In the meantime there is a winter looming. Already the invitations have slowed as everyone hunkers down into their fall routines and prepares for a Canadian winter. For the first time ever she finds herself dreading it, understanding in small measure why people might consider heading south for several months. But she is alone and not likely to pursue that option. Her home is here - for now.

On losing Michael she also lost her job. Golden handshake. Instant retirement. Sense of purpose dangling in the breeze. Focus required after so many years of her life charted out so intricately on the map of Parkinson's disease caregiving. She wonders how she will manage as a single woman with no responsibilities in the world except to herself. So much of her self-definition has been wrapped up in her thirty-four years of happy marriage, childrearing, caregiving, homeschooling, community service...loving. She knows little else so her heart immediately thinks of other ways to be of service to her world.

After years of caring for Michael through life and death, as well as logging many hours at the bedside of other terminally ill family members, she has developed a high comfort level with illness and the mystical process of dying. Her round-the-clock care of her husband allowed her to see the process in all its horror, mystery and beauty. Very little fazes her now. She has been urged to pursue some aspect of palliative care and she knows she is well-suited to the work. One night, immediately after returning home from the last adventure, she sat down at the computer and mused about the next step. Within seconds she found herself on a website for a local homeless shelter that, remarkably, is also home of the only hospice for the homeless in North America. Her fingers were filling out the online application form before she knew what she was doing. Before even completing and officially submitting it, somehow the channels were opened and an email dropped into her inbox thanking her for her application. Huh? How was that possible? Taking it as a sign, she continued to fill out the lengthy form and redundantly pressed the submit button. Within a few more seconds another email arrived giving her the dates of information sessions at the shelter, the first one being held the following night. The path seemed to be clear.

Everything happened quickly. Her interview was arranged for the afternoon following her first hike with her new group. A game-changing day. A police check is all that stands in her way to what might become her life work.


Photo by Claire Verney, November, 2013.





6 comments:

  1. Hi, just found your blog on PD and wanted to ask a couple questions. Please get back to me at mtrucillo(at)recallcenter(dot)com when you can. Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  2. After reading your post, I just realized that having this kind of disease was not a mere joke. You need to bare excruciating pain. It reminds me of my Uncle who has also an illness like this. Fortunately, my cousin recommended us to visit Placidway.com for us to have a Free quote and luckily, we came to a conclusion on how to deal with this. I am happy you are doing fine too. Keep it up! Be positive always.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Irrespective of receiving daily oral or future injectable depot therapies, these require health care visits for medication and monitoring of safety and response. If patients are treated early enough, before a lot of immune system damage has occurred, life expectancy is close to normal, as long as they remain on successful treatment. However, when patients stop therapy, virus rebounds to high levels in most patients, sometimes associated with severe illness because i have gone through this and even an increased risk of death. The aim of “cure”is ongoing but i still do believe my government made millions of ARV drugs instead of finding a cure. for ongoing therapy and monitoring. ARV alone cannot cure HIV as among the cells that are infected are very long-living CD4 memory cells and possibly other cells that act as long-term reservoirs. HIV can hide in these cells without being detected by the body’s immune system. Therefore even when ART completely blocks subsequent rounds of infection of cells, reservoirs that have been infected before therapy initiation persist and from these reservoirs HIV rebounds if therapy is stopped. “Cure” could either mean an eradication cure, which means to completely rid the body of reservoir virus or a functional HIV cure, where HIV may remain in reservoir cells but rebound to high levels is prevented after therapy interruption.Dr Itua Herbal Medicine makes me believes there is a hope for people suffering from,Parkinson's disease,Schizophrenia,Cancer,Scoliosis,Fibromyalgia,Fluoroquinolone Toxicity
    Syndrome Fibrodysplasia Ossificans Progressiva.Fatal Familial Insomnia Factor V Leiden Mutation ,Epilepsy Dupuytren's disease,Desmoplastic small-round-cell tumor Diabetes ,Coeliac disease,Creutzfeldt–Jakob disease,Cerebral Amyloid Angiopathy, Ataxia,Arthritis,Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis,Alzheimer's disease,Adrenocortical carcinoma.Asthma,Allergic diseases.Hiv_ Aids,Herpes,Inflammatory bowel disease ,Copd,Diabetes,Hepatitis,I read about him online how he cure Tasha and Tara so i contacted him on drituaherbalcenter@gmail.com even talked on whatsapps +2348149277967 believe me it was easy i drank his herbal medicine for two weeks and i was cured just like that isn't Dr Itua a wonder man? Yes he is! I thank him so much so i will advise if you are suffering from one of those diseases Pls do contact him he's a nice man.

    ReplyDelete
  4. My life is beautiful thanks to you, Mein Helfer. Lord Jesus in my life as a candle light in the darkness. You showed me the meaning of faith with your words. I know that even when I cried all day thinking about how to recover, you were not sleeping, you were dear to me. I contacted the herbal center Dr Itua, who lived in West Africa. A friend of mine here in Hamburg is also from Africa. She told me about African herbs but I was nervous. I am very afraid when it comes to Africa because I heard many terrible things about them because of my Christianity. god for direction, take a bold step and get in touch with him in the email and then move to WhatsApp, he asked me if I can come for treatment or I want a delivery, I told him I wanted to know him I buy ticket in 2 ways to Africa To meet Dr. Itua, I went there and I was speechless from the people I saw there. Patent, sick people. Itua is a god sent to the world, I told my pastor about what I am doing, Pastor Bill Scheer. We have a real battle beautifully with Spirit and Flesh. Adoration that same night. He prayed for me and asked me to lead. I spent 2 weeks and 2 days in Africa at Dr Itua Herbal Home. After the treatment, he asked me to meet his nurse for the HIV test when I did it. It was negative, I asked my friend to take me to another nearby hospital when I arrived, it was negative. I was overwhite with the result, but happy inside of me. We went with Dr. Itua, I thank him but I explain that I do not have enough to show him my appreciation, that he understands my situation, but I promise that he will testify about his good work. Thank God for my dear friend, Emma, I know I could be reading this now, I want to thank you. And many thanks to Dr. Itua Herbal Center. He gave me his calendar that I put on my wall in my house. Dr. Itua can also cure the following diseases ... Cancer, HIV, Herpes, Hepatitis B, Inflammatory Liver, Diabetis, Fribroid,Parkinson's disease,Inflammatory bowel disease ,Fibromyalgia, recover your ex. You can contact him by email or whatsapp, @ .. drituaherbalcenter@gmail.com, phone number .. + 2348149277967 .. He is a good doctor, talk to him kindly. I'm sure he will also listen to you.

    ReplyDelete
  5. First and foremost, yay! If you are sick person? You're not in the dark anymore, and that's half the battle. Secondly, don't get discouraged. Although it might be hard to not beat yourself up over the ups and downs (it took going through an entire category of medications, endless rounds of physical therapy, multiple casts, different specialists, and taking a drug every day to stay alive. That wasn't for me I must say, I suffered HIV/Herpes since 2003 when I was raped, for me to find something to believe in that I will be save someday was tough to say of things) and the outbreak remind me on how I got the disease. After I have a chance to visit my African friend in Miami then he told me about Dr Itua who reside in west Africa(Nigeria)I know the country has a lot of sorts of things out there but i just have to trust him and I proceed with the treatment, happily I take it for two weeks as Dr Itua instructed me to so after two weeks I went for test then I found out I was cured, The herbal medicine has no side effect and I'm healthy today no more pills or outbreak I'm getting my life back now, gradually. Contact Dr Itua if you are suffering from the below diseases.....HIV/Aids, Herpes, Genital Or Oral disease, Wart, Shingles and Blisters, Cold Sore, Lupus, Chronic Lyme Disease, Alzheimer's Disease, Parkinson, Hepatitis A/B. Diabetes, Cancer. Info Contact...drituaherbalcenter@gmail.com Or Whatsapp Number...+2348149277967. ...

    ReplyDelete

  6. My husband was diagnosed with early onset Parkinson's disease at 57.his symptoms were shuffling of feet,slurred speech, low volume speech, degradation of hand writing, horrible driving skills, right arm held at 45 degree angle, things were tough for me, but now he finally free from the disease with the help of total cure ultimate health home, he now walks properly and all symptoms has reversed, he had trouble with balance especially at night, getting into the shower and exiting it is difficult,getting into bed is also another thing he finds impossible.we had to find a better solution for his condition which has really helped him a lot,the biggest helped we had was ultimatehealthhome they walked us through the proper steps,am highly recommended this ultimatehealthhome@gmail.com to anyone who needs help.

    ReplyDelete